Coming out as Trans / Gender Non Conforming Male I never set out to ‘pass’ as a woman. For starters that would probably even bankrupt Donald Trump with surgery costs. Let’s face it no amount of surgery is going to turn me into a woman so why even bother? Reality if is I’m not a woman. I’m just me! And let’s face it most Trans women tend to have this patriarchal illusion of women.
I’ll admit it’s not always been out coming out and I’ve had a few problems including losing my job in the June 2016. I’ve been given some abuse in the street. In 2015 some men wanted to physically harm me in broad daylight on the streets of Birmingham. One man even wanted to ‘Rape the woman out of me’.
Now I tend to take things on the chin and when I’ve faced any grief as described about I challenge that behaviour from men who see a major problem with my identity. I stood up and in doing so men backed down. Even the men at work shit it! I kid you not! They’d give me abuse and I’d give it back. However I wasn’t aware they were also making complaints to the management every time I countered their abuse. So in the end I lost my job. I was set up! Still I didn’t go down without a fight!
I have always stood proud and as I continue with my journey I never once have felt shame. I am happy who I am. I don’t feel ashamed.
Why should I?
My journey has consisted of doing what I did before came out. I enjoy seeing bands play. I love photography, Love meeting new people. Love visiting places be they in the UK or abroad. I love music and with it comes my love for Jack Daniels. What a drink! The list is endless!
There’s many positives in my life and men who come across me need to accept that I am a man with feminine traits. If they don’t like it then it’s their problem not mine!
I’m a man in what are considered women’s clothes.
DEAL WITH IT!
The vast majority of Trans women will have similar experiences to me. Where we differ is how we have chosen to deal with the problems we encounter. Trans women will fight tooth and nail to enter women’s spaces and take control of them by whatever means they have.
I have no interest in imposing on women and their safe spaces.
Biological women are not the problem. The problem is with other men. Why should women have to make room for us in their spaces when we should be standing up to men and telling them to ‘Fuck Off’ if they don’t like us?
To be honest life isn’t as bad as what many Trans women make out it to be. I go out to bars, venues, hang out with friends and with it enjoying life as much as possible. I am very public and part of my journey has been to hit the streets to educate the general public I honestly don’t know what there is to fear in the UK being Trans.
It’s also fair to say that biological women get more grief in public than the Trans community today. Cat calling, harassment right through to sexual assault, rape and murder! If many Trans women were to get off their high horses and looked at the statistics we’re far from being the most persecuted group of people on this planet.
It’s time Trans women (Feminine men) stopped feeling sorry for themselves and realise that life isn’t all about them! It certainly isn’t about forcing / guilt tripping women into having us in their safe spaces. As I said we should be taking up the issues with other men rather than projecting those problems on to women.
2017 is soon up on us and I would love to see more Trans women to drop their advocates and go out and live in the real world. It’s time to get a reality check instead of living under an illusion. Illusions aren’t good for you. Living in the real world is much more fun.
You will probably start enjoying life again!